Summertime 3

I don’t want you to get me wrong by believing that my entire summertime was all play and no work. Work was a BIG part of my early growing up years.

My first job was at 6-7 years old when I had to walk through the fields after a corn picker to pick up the ears of corn that were left by the machine. We had to put them into bushel baskets and didn’t get paid for it. Another year older and I could start “steering” a tractor. I wouldn’t call it “driving” yet since all I could to was stop and go (with the hand clutch) and steer a wheel bigger than my arms stretched. I would steer the tractor with a wagon behind it through the field while my dad and older brothers would throw bales of hay on the wagon. At this same age I would have to work in the garden with my mom planting seeds, weeding, hoeing and finally harvesting the vegetables and fruit.

When I was young my father built a chicken house that would house 6000 laying hens and it was my job to pick up the eggs twice a day. Sometime later I would get the job of feeding them and shooting the rats with our .22 rifle.

After the age of 10 I would get more and better jobs. One of them was actually DRIVING the tractor disking stocks of corn down to get the field ready for the next planting or dragging a field. Driving activities that wouldn’t destroy a crop if I drove into a ditch or something. Milking the cow in the morning before school, picking up eggs and feeding the chickens became a regular chore.

After the age of 13 I would be driving the tractors and pickups into the fields, even trying my hand at the big grain trucks. I would be asked to cultivate (the hardest driving job) but my dad and oldest brother didn’t have me do that too often. Now I was of the age where many of my oldest brothers were at college or had their own jobs and dad NEEDED me on the farm. Now I would spend 3-5 days home from school to work in the busy planting or harvesting season. There was nothing better than staying home from school to work.

By the age of 16 when I could get a regular license I was doing everything on the farm but I was also looking for my own job. A job that PAID, because, you see, working on the farm your pay was a little different. I can still hear my father saying: “You eat and sleep in my house: THAT is your pay!”

I miss the summertime of my childhood, but not just for me. I miss that summertime because you will RARELY find a child working hard at the age of 7. Today’s people have this crazy idea that giving a child work or chores at a young age is abuse and that they should be allowed to play all the time. I miss that age of building responsibility in youth at a YOUNG age. I knew at a young age that if I didn’t work … I didn’t eat. Can you imagine the outcry of parenting “experts” today if they heard my father say that to me? I miss the summertime of my youth and I mourn the loss of that summertime for today’s youth.

Summertime 2

One of my favorite activities as a summertime child on the farm involved the use of sticks. We never really knew we were poor (much to my parent’s credit) but my favorite toy was a stick. I have to believe that my mom looking out through the kitchen window at my activities had to be thinking: “What is that boy doing now?”

The trees on the farm were a constant source of entertainment for me. I remember the first time I fell out of a tree on my back knocking the breath out of me. I thought I was going to die. I couldn’t inhale, couldn’t yell for mom, or anything. Just when I thought I was heading for the pearly gates I would slowly figure out how to breathe again and go on playing. The perfect stick was my best toy. I would take the smaller one and use as a sword; swashbuckling my way through the yard, defeating countless enemies. Sometimes I would have one in each hand as I battled. (Again, I can’t help but wonder what my mom was thinking when she looked out the window). I bigger stick would be a perfect rifle and I would spend my time defeating the Germans of WW2 with dramatic leaps and sprints to protected areas for the next expert marksman shot. Sometimes a sniper in a tree where I would be hit and fall out, dramatically hitting the ground but rolling to a shooting position to kill my pursuer. An even bigger stick would be a pole vault pole for me. I would practice poling from one place to another; from one dirt pile to another and when I got daring I would actually use it to pole vault over a barb wire fence.

My toys were not expensive, free in fact. A good stick was a great rifle and a clod of dirt made a great grenade. Kids today have too much money spent on them. I saw a 10ish boy yell at his mom because the gun she bought for his Wii wasn’t the right one for the game he was playing. The gun cost $50, the Wii another $100 and then you have the game and the TV on top of that. Probably over $500 to play the same game I was playing… only I had fun … outside.

I miss the summertime of my childhood but not just for me. I miss that summertime because the parents today think that joy in being a child comes from THINGS and not from imagination and freedom. Money cannot buy a child joy in his/her youth. Freedom to experience new things, letting their imagination run wild not their strong will. Sure, I wanted new toys and would cry when my mom and dad didn’t get me the perfect thing but soon after I realized all the crying in the world was not going to change their minds I picked up my stick and rode it into my imagination.

Summertime 1

The summertime of my memories is filled with adventure. There is no better place in summertime to be than on a farm. The majority of the “chores” are done with the planting of the crops so a young boy is free to adventure through the growing fields.

There were no video games, in fact TV was black and white, only had 3 channels and you had to change those channels by going up to the box and rotating a dial. Sometimes you were forced to stand in a certain place holding a wire coat hanger to get the best reception. Staying in your room was not only “NOT DONE” but it wasn’t even conceived of. Your room was for sleeping and changing and nothing more. The place to be was NOT in front of a computer screen or TV screen but outside, you know the place that shows up on your screen saver.

I would be up early and munch down my Wheaties or Corn Flakes with fresh milk from the cow I had to milk. I would be outside as soon as I could pull on my raggedy Keds. If the rains had come I would spend the day playing in the farm ditches. I would build canals that ran water towards my mud town. I would spend hours building a mud community complete with homes, schools, and churches. I would build bridges with small sticks and well-placed mud as mortar. Sometimes I would take out my Matchbox cars and even build garages for them. Noon would pass and I would forget about lunch. Mom wouldn’t call out, dad wouldn’t send out a search party. They know when the sun started setting I would mosey home. After hours of architectural work I would survey my realm; it was time. The creek would be a calm flow until I decided to open the flood gates. Then the floods came. I watches in adolescent glee as the water washed away hours of work; taking my houses, churches, schools and Matchbox with it. When all was gone I would jump into the ditch to find my cars and maybe a few tadpoles I could take home in a jar to watch turn into frogs. Happy with a complete summer day I would make my way back home as the sun was setting and ask mom to help me get the dozen leaches off my legs and arms.

Hours of building only to destroy. Stripping to my tighty-whities to play in a ditch. Taking new toys and burying them in mud and water. Spending 12 hours on my own as a 7-8 year old without adult supervision. Gleefully plucking leaches off my body. All these things would put a modern day psychologist into shock. They would have taken me away from my parents and into a “good” home. They would have sent me to a child psychologist trying to discover the roots of my “destructive tendencies.” They would have put me on some kind of drug to calm me down and make me want to set in front of a screen of some kind “like a good child should.”

I miss the summertime of my childhood, but not just for me. I miss the summertime of my childhood because my grandchildren will never experience it in today’s society of protection, prevention and drug induced calmness. I miss THAT summertime.

Heaven Is …

I am a child of summer. I would LOVE nothing more than living in a perpetual summertime. I love being outside in nature. I love hearing birds sing and lawn mowers at 6 am. I love wearing nothing more than shorts and a shirt and going around barefoot. I love open windows and cool breezes. I love green flowering and fruiting plants. I love the sun’s warmth on my skin like a blanket. I love summer.

I am not a child of winter. I don’t miss cold, snow and wind chills. I don’t miss frosted windows, windshields and mustaches. I don’t miss the hollow sound of creaking, empty trees dealing with overweight snow and brittle winds. I don’t miss bundling up in layers upon layers of clothing just to get the mail. I don’t miss the salty roads, dirty snow piles, and slush. I don’t miss the sunless days where cold comes on you like a prickly sweater. I don’t miss winter.

I tell people, who don’t live in the south that we have one spring, two summers and a really hot season. I don’t miss winter. Of course this is a preference and I know others who have EXACTLY the opposite view of mine. I have a distant relative with whom I share the same name, who lives in Norway and LOVES the winter and can’t wait for summer to be over. Others I know love the changing of the seasons and would miss summer leaves turning to fall, fall colors turning to a white blanket, winter white turning to the new growth of spring, and spring sprouting into a full blown summertime.

I cannot see myself in a cold climate again. But I can’t say I will NEVER be in a cold climate again. I find an even deeper truth than my love of summer. I find that God has plans that may not have ANYTHING to do with my preferences. What happens if God calls my wife and I back to Michigan, or to a church in Northern Alberta? No, sorry God, I prefer summertime. How about Hawaii or the Florida Keys?

Actually that is a picture of heaven for me. Right now, my preferences and God’s plan are often at odds. But there will come a time when they are one and the same. There is a place where I will be just where God wants me to be and that will be the same place where I prefer to be. That time and that place is heaven. I can’t wait (well, I can, but you know what I mean) to move there!

Heaven is where your preferences and God’s plan become one.

Sucks to Grow Old?

Three years ago, while playing softball, I was running to first base and heard and FELT a crunching in my foot. Ouch … another sprain, last game for a while until it heals. Didn’t heal and I ended up having surgery to remove pieces of the bones I broke and to remove the feeling of walking barefoot on stones that I had for months. JUST FROM RUNNING TO FIRST BASE! Boy it sucks to grow old. I remember running ALL DAY at school playing ball, at home to escape my brothers, by myself just for the fun of it. Running and running some more, never having to worry about a broken bone.

Well I signed up for a softball team for the first time since that injury and we had our first game last night. After losing 65 pounds and triking 50-60 miles a week I was feeling pretty indestructible. Just had to get the swing back and work on the throwing arm a bit. My first at bat was a mighty swing and I popped it up to the first baseman but at the end of the swing was a silent pop and a lightning bolt of pain in my elbow. Hyper-extension. I grinned and bore it for the next few innings playing with just one arm but too many balls were getting hit to me and I had to concede to the handicap. Asked Coach to take me out of the game and probably out of the season. Man it sucks to grow old.

I had ice on it last night and heat on it now as I type. Luckily on my left arm I can still do most of the things I could before, just with more pain.

Pain has a way of making you aware of things around you: how good it was NOT being in pain; how I take my left arm for granted; how old I am getting; how I need to exercise more; etc.

In life we find that the more extreme the pain, and the closer to death we come; the more seriously we take life. NOT that there aren’t fun things when you are terminal but there aren’t PETTY things when you are terminal. Cancer patients will tell you how sweeter life can be when your recognize, because of the cancer, how special it is. Every moment with a loved one is precious. Every flower, sunrise, unseen-before sight, is now brighter and more colorful.

How great would it be to live life like that all the time? How great would it be to NOT take life for granted? How great would it be to drop all the pettiness and prejudices of life? How great would it be to live like you are dying?

I thought I was indestructible again and was AGAIN proven wrong. Now I appreciate health and life more because of it. I would encourage you to be smarter than me … appreciate it BEFORE the pain comes. Appreciate it NOW because you know, it really doesn’t have to suck to grow old.

I LOVE IT!

How often have you heard the word "love" today? On the one had we NEVER hear it enough from those WE love. But on the other hand we hear it too much and that, I believe, is the problem.

I followed behind a couple, in their thirties and a little overweight, at a salad bar restaurant. Here is a summary of their conversation: "Ooooh. I love this kind of salad don't you? Don't you just love it. Here look! I love these, these are great, I love them on a salad. Didn't you just love that meal we had last night. Well, they have those corn and peas here that you can put on your salad because I KNOW you LOVE them. Ahhh, cucumbers, I love cucumbers AND I love these small tomatoes. Don't you just love them?" To each love comment the guy nodded his head and just said, "Love it!" every now and again.

Words are important and we denigrate words when we used them for other than their intended and MEANINGFUL purpose. Now we all know our idioms and we know the evolution of words like: "cool, far out, NICE, bad, etc." When I say I love my grandson it means something more than if I say I love sweet peas doesn't it? Shouldn't it? No wait, I REALLY love my grandson but I only love my vegetables.

The way to the heart is through the words of the mind and when we disengage our mind from our heart language we've lost something. We have lost to ability to express how we really feel. We end up having to define our words in order to get the emotion accross. "So when I say I love you I am saying that it is more than I love vegetables and more than my car but less than the Indianapolis Colts when they win the Superbowl."

Mindless love leads only to error and miscommunication. A mindless fervor in love leads to abuse and burnout. A mindless spiritual love leads to cultic error and emptiness. The way to engage the heart is through the mind. Words are the language of the mind, if you don't believe me trying silent reading without repeating the words on the page in your mind, you can't. Even though you are reading silently your mind HEARS the words you are reading. But if the words you hear have a diluted or lost meaning it will never "sink in" and you won't really hear it.
My father never told his kids he loved them when we were growing up. Only recently have I been able to say "I love you dad" on the phone to him as I get ready to hang up. At 50 years old I heard my say I love you for the first time. It went through my ear, through my mind and straight to my heart.

Say it, say it often and MEAN IT!

Words of Wisdom

Inc. Magazine asked successful entrepreneurs what it took to be successful or what was the most important thing they learned on the way to building their company. Here are a few of the gems:

• Get in over your head. Never take on something that you can handle always attack something that is just beyond your reach. That is the only way you GROW.
• Focus on simple things and target them. You don't have to become the next Facebook, there is plenty of success in being less known but stay focused.
• You will be remembered for how you deal with the ups and downs. What will people say about you when you are successful? What will they say about you during the hard times?
• Failing gracefully is more important than succeeding.
• Surround yourself with great people and you will be great.
• Hire slow; fire fast.
• It will take four times as much work as you expect but it will be ten times more rewarding than you imagined.
• There is ALWAYS a solution.
• Never confuse a consultant with a partner.
• You don't lose until you give up.

I find it amazing that most of the wisdom that comes from successful businessmen and women is the same wisdom that comes from scripture. Each one of these has a biblical equivalent that could be found but more importantly they keep with the moral code of the Bible.

There is NOTHING biblical about being comfortable where you are. The Bible is all about growth , learning, trying, experimenting. When you fail it is all about forgiveness, moving on, seeking advisors, working it out, and MOVING ON! When you succeed the Bible is all about teaching, sharing, and giving thanks.

There is NOTHING biblical about being taken care of or expecting blessings to be showered on you. There is NOTHING biblical about doing the minimum to get by. There is NOTHING biblical about expecting the rich or the Government to take care of you. There is NOTHING biblical about license or sloth.

Take a chance. Start a company. Start working for FREE until they decide to pay you. Start at minimum wage just for the love of WORK and MOVING and GROWING and LEARNING. The skills and gumption needed in handing out burgers at MacDonald's is closer to running your own company than you would think.

Wile E. Coyote is my hero!

There's not a lot you can learn from the Road Runner, but the Coyote knows the secret of wealth. In September, 1949, the Coyote - Carnivorous vulgaris - built a catapult. But instead of launching him toward the Road Runner, it launched him straight up into a stone outcropping. The Coyote crawled out of the hole and went back to work.

In December, 1955, the Coyote - Eatibus almost anythingus - waited anxiously for the Road Runner to come around a corner, then lit the fuse of a cannon. But instead of firing the cannonball, the entire cannon - with the Coyote behind it - fired backwards into a mountain wall. Again the Coyote crawled out of the hole and went back to work.

In May, 1980, the Coyote - Nemesis ridiculii– climbed aboard a rocket, aimed it toward the Road Runner on the opposite side of the canyon and lit the fuse. The fuel and nosecone of the rocket launched out of the rocket hull, leaving the Coyote sitting aboard that empty cylinder. He fell, annoyed, to the canyon floor. The Coyote climbed out of the canyon and went back to work.
Are you beginning to see a trend here? The Coyote – Inevitablius Succeedus - never gives up.
The Coyote is Santiago in The Old Man and the Sea. After 84 consecutive days of not catching a fish, the old man rises before dawn and pulls steadily on the oars until he is far beyond the sight of land.

The Coyote is Rowan of A Message to Garcia. Alone behind enemy lines, outnumbered thousands to one, Rowan never considers the impossibility of his mission, but doggedly attempts the ridiculous until he casually accomplishes the miraculous.

The Coyote is Quixote, foolishly committed to a questionable quest, paying his pint of blood daily without complaint, never wavering in his enthusiasm, never doubting he will ultimately succeed.
When we were young and fast and invincible, the Road Runner was our hero. Impervious to danger, the Road Runner ran without tiring, scooted without fear and beep-beeped coolly like a blue James Bond. But as I look down now from this creaking tower of years, I see it was the Coyote who deserved my admiration. That TV show was never about the Road Runner. It was always about the Coyote. The Coyote was determined.

"Determined" is a word much misunderstood. Obstinate people are not determined. They merely suffer from too much pride. Stubborn people are not determined. Stubbornness is willful ignorance. Determination is an unblinking willingness to pay the price as often as it must be paid. Determination is never losing sight of your objective, no matter what comes along to distract you. Determination is endurance.

How about you? If Failure appears without warning and throws you onto the rocks below, will you happily crawl out of that smoking crater and go back to work?

Exposing Yourself

The kids were giggling like crazy as we played outside on a hot summer day. We had a "kiddie" pool but within minutes it was as warm as the ambient air. The only source of coolness was the garden hose. With towels wrapped protectively around their heads and held there by their upraised arms like a boxer defending against the opponent's blows the kids tried to keep the stream from hitting them with a full-on facial. I manned the hose with my thumb on the end to get the pressured stream as the three of them giggled and briefly exposed their face and upper body. I would quickly switch from one to the other "just missing" each of them as they closed up again. But every now and again I would catch one of them exposing a little too long and they would get a mouthful and nose-full of cool well water. Now only two kids were giggling while the third caught their breath and dealt with the sting up the nose.

You have so many options in this world now that you can expose yourself to; what do you chose and how do you chose what to open up to? This becomes an important question because your exposures have a lot to do with the kind of person you turn out to be.

Expose yourself to bad and you will get used to and maybe even become bad.

Expose yourself to good and you will get used to and maybe even become good.

Expose yourself to get-rich-quick and you will fixate on money.

Expose yourself to the smart and wise and you will be too.

Expose yourself to anger and you will be angry.

Expose yourself to love and you will experience love.

Expose yourself to fast food and you will crave the Big Mac or some King sandwich.

Expose yourself to art and you will appreciate it, understand it, and seek to make it.

The wisest man who ever lived said "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." Solomon knew the GIGO principal. (Garbage In Garbage Out; Good In Good Out) We all know that principal but most of the time we believe we can hold that towel and our arms over our face and not get blasted up the nose with the BAD. We do this because the BAD has a better PR firm working for it. BAD looks so tempting to us while GOOD looks so boring. BAD is instant gratification and GOOD is delayed. A Big Mac and a La-Z-Boy now is so much more appealing than celery and a gym.

Next time we will discuss GOOD vs. BAD and how to decide between them, but for now learn from the sting of water up your nose and don't do it again. Guard carefully what you expose yourself to.

Unmanaged Time

"Where did all the time go!"

"Boy that hour FLEW by!"

"I just don't know where that day went!"

"I can't believe Christmas is just around the corner!"

"What have I done with my life!"

All these statements we have all heard and they all relate to the passing of time. Why does time fly by? Why do hours, days, weeks and even YEARS fly by before we "know" it? Why does it seem kids grow up too fast? I have written a LOT about time management and you can look up my columns on this over the last 5 years on my blog but I have a new twist for you on time management.

Here you go; are you ready? This is a pearl of wisdom that could change your life if you let it: "Unmanaged time flows to your weaknesses." There ya go, if you understand the implications of this then time will NEVER again fly by, you will find joy in life and it will cure acne. Well, the last one there was kind of a stretch but let's think about this.

If you don't manage your time it doesn't just disappear it FLOWS to your weaknesses, your habits, your laziness, or your closet sins. Unmanaged time is NOT freedom, unmanaged time is bondage due to a lack of self-discipline. Say you have a tendency to play computer games and you have a "spare" hour before you go to work; what do you do? You quick hop on the computer and play and "before you know it" you are late for work. Say you got off work early and you had a few extra bucks in your britches so you stop at the local casino and slide the dough in the slot and "BOY , that hour flew by!" and now you are late in getting home and have to explain where you were. Unmanaged time flows to you weaknesses.

Why not use that extra time to exercise (you know you need it) or to see mom and dad (you know you should) or take your kids/grandkids out for ice cream (you haven't spent much time with them lately to know what's going on in their lives). Why not PLAN what to do in the 24 hours God has given you and not just let it flow away into a malaise of regret. Here are a couple of helps to stop that flow of unmanaged time:

- Carry that book that you want to read with you so you can read it while waiting in line or when you get a few "extra" minutes.

- NEVER watch TV without an exercise weight. If you get too tired to keep it up you have to turn it off.

- Take online classes instead of online games.

- PLAN to see and spend times with friends and family, don't just EXPECT it to happen.

- Get a hobby that "trips your trigger" like photography, coin collecting, bird watching, or whatever to channel that flow time when it becomes free.

I am NOT saying that watching TV, playing video games, gambling or even extra sleep is BAD. What I am saying is that IF your time flows into your areas of weakness you will forever be wondering what happened to your time, and so your LIFE. You will forever be behind, running to catch up, and wondering "what happened to all that time?"

Schadenfreude

I was calmly eating with a friend of mine at a deli-type restaurant and a waitress goes by with a tray full of glasses and coffee cups that she had just bussed from a table. A woman's purse lay in a place that was unexpected and as the waitress rushed past the table she caught the purse. You can guess what happened: the glasses and cups made a loud crash as they broke into a million pieces, the silverware added a light percussion as they bounced, and the cry of surprise seemed to echo in the deli. Everyone heard it and some gasped, some had a direct inhalation of air until they found she was okay, others helped her up, but some, and not just a few, some cheered and applauded.

In a Simpson's episode Ned Flander's business is failing and Lisa has to explain to Homer that he is feeling "schadenfreude" a German word for taking pleasure in the suffering of others. The Broadway show Avenue Q sings of schadenfreude as "me being glad that I am not YOU!" and "Don't you feel all warm and cozy when you see people out in the rain." Homer remarks, "Those Germans have a word for everything!"

Solomon, in Proverbs tells us "Do not gloat when you enemy falls; when he stumbles do not rejoice or the Lord will see and disapprove and turn his wrath away from him." We know it is wrong and we often feel guilty about it but there is something in us that celebrates when an enemy falls.

The Greeks had the concept pegged as "epikhairekakos" which means taking pleasure in another's ill fortune. But they also had the opposite but SAME response of "phthonos" when means getting pain from another's GOOD fortune.

Wow ... I just realized that was a broad brush stroke from the Simpsons to Broadway to German to Ancient Hebrew poetry and finally to Ancient Greek philosophy ... all because a waitress dropped her tray. But I think that just proves how prevalent schadenfreude is. EVERYBODY deals with it.

Our nature tends to lift ourselves through denigrating others. We feel better about ourselves because others are worse off. Or we are upset because others have good things happening to them. But we are not animals, we can fight our nature. We can decide to help the waitress. We can decide to rejoice in the good things of others. We can decide to shove schadenfreude to the shelf and live a life of joy not matter the circumstances. We CAN decide. I think it is called fahrvergnuegen ... those Germans have a word for everything.

We Suck at Receiving Gifts

When you sell something to me we exchange items of value. I give you money and you give me something, or some service and the deal is done. We each go away with what we started with only in a different form. You got money lost the thing, I got the thing and lost the money. Even Steven. This is good, and it works and it is what most economies are based on.

But what if I gave you more money than you asked for? What if you gave me more "stuff" than I paid for? There is an imbalance created, a vacuum, and nature abhors a vacuum. The imbalance must be resolved.

In Native American tradition in the Pacific Northwest giving was a sign of power. A powerful chief would give away everything he owned as a sign of his wealth and power. This was called "potlatch". Think of the power and confidence behind that kind of a gift, that kind of an imbalance!

We sometimes resolve the gift imbalance by acknowledging the givers creativity and insight. Artists do this when they put a painting in a museum or a song out on the internet. "Here's a free gift" they say. We don't pay for it but we acknowledge it and then, if it is good or powerful, we pass it on and we become givers by sharing with others.

Sometimes we repair the imbalance of a gift by becoming closer to the giver. What was a simple transaction in business now becomes a friend to a friend. We develop a sense of preferred customers, vendors or clients because of the gift.

BUT sometimes we develop a sense of resentment. "Why are you rich and powerful and I am not?" so a cycle of dependency is created "You NEED to give to me because you are rich and powerful!" This gifting hurts both parties.

The key to giving gifts is in the sense of FORWARD motivation. If my gift to you inspires you to do something so you can give to another and another and so on; then the gift has a forward momentum. If my gift to you causes you to resent me and begin to EXPECT that gift or an BIGGER one next time and the next and so on; then my gift has a negative momentum that is destructive to both of us.

People love to give gifts. Not just because of the sense of power like the Native American Chief but simply because that is how we were built by God. But as receivers of gifts we generally suck. We don't know how to receive gifts. We become resentful and dependent.

So here is your quick primer on receiving a gift: 1] Thank the giver profusely and ask if there is anything that you can give them in return. 2] Understand the gift is from the heart and a love for you, or just people in general and don't resent it. 3] When the opportunity presents itself (and it WILL) give back, not necessarily to the one who gave to you (in fact, it would be better if not because the joy then spreads). 4] Lather, rinse and REPEAT!

Split Time

It is rare to have occurrences that impact the WHOLE WORLD in such a way that everybody is affected by it. I remember things that impacted my life: 9/11, fall of Soviet Union, assassination of Martin Luther King, Viet Nam, and I even remember the assassination of Kennedy even though I was only 3 at the time. My parents and grandparents will add World War II, the Great Depression, and even World War I as having the BIGGEST impact on them and the lives of all those around them. But that PALES in compression to the greatest event in all history, the even that split time in half.

Anno Domini was the Latin we used to use for when time split in half. "Year of our Lord." We used to be in the Year of our Lord 2010. Before time split we called it BC which is the very UN Latin "Before Christ." It actually used to be the Latin form AC (Ante Christum) which means the same but Pope Gregory thought it was too confusing so he used the "english-ized" form of BEFORE Christ. Earlier versions of the 1580 Gregorian Calendar even had the FULL designation of ADNJC (Anno Domini Nostri Iesus Christi) or the Year of our Lord Jesus Christ. Can you imagine that moniker on our calendars today? We are in the Year of our Lord Jesus Christ 2010; somehow I don't think that would make it in today's public schools.

In fact we are even going further from it today. You will notice new designations on the Discovery Chanel and new history books called the Common Era. We now designate the years as BCE or Before Common Era and CE which is Common Era. We are now in 2010 CE. We have taken Christ out of our year designations.

I have preached on the fact that miracles become mundane when time is added. The more time, the more mundane a miracle becomes. This is happening with the life of Jesus Christ. The event that split time in half is now becoming mundane.

We have forgotten the trauma of WWI, the Great Depression, WWII, Korea, Viet Name and even 9/11 already.

We have distanced ourselves from the shock of the assassinations of both Kennedy's, Martin Luther King, and even the attempts on Ford and Reagan and the Pope.

AND we have forgotten or simply gotten used to the most IMPACTFUL event in all history: the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. The event that split time in HALF!

I don't care whether you call it BC or BCE, AD or CE, it really doesn't matter because they are still split by the REALITY of our Savior and Lord Jesus Christ!

He is risen. He is risen indeed!

How to be Wealthy

"Every life has a scoreboard and how you choose to keep score is up to you." Roy Williams.

How do you measure how successful you are? How do you keep score of your wealth?

"Wealth is measured in months. How many months can you survive if you no longer got a paycheck and you lived completely on your investments and savings? Once that becomes indefinitely - then you are wealthy." Robert Kyosaki.

Some people measure success by their ability to hurt others. The more they hurt; the more successful they are. I knew a couple of guys who measured a successful cruise by how many women they were able to "bed" in the days of the cruise. We all know people who use crazy measurements for success. Most people tend to measure wealth and success by the amount of THINGS they have and how expensive those THINGS are.

Let me give you a few measures of success that you might now have considered before. (I borrowed much of this from Roy Williams, sorry Roy):

1) How curious are you? The more curious you are - the more successful and wealthy you are. Never lose the wonder of discovery in the universe. Never quit learning, experimenting, and discovering and your coffers will overflow.

2) How LITTLE do I need to be happy? "It is not the man who has little, but he who desires more, that is poor" said Seneca. Contentment is wealth and success, just one dollar more is poor-ness.

3) Have I proven that I care? Everyone who eats a whopper leaves a little more depressed because no one REALLY cooked that meal, but something grilled at home, burnt, and dry, and without your favorite pickle relish but done with a love for you - makes you RICH! Success is a race to prove I care about you.

4) Have I made someone's life better today? The people who focus on making other's lives better are the wealthy ones. The hoarders, racked by selfish ambition are the poor. What have you done today to make the world a better place for the people in it?

The point is that money in the bank is a poor scoreboard of success and wealth. Don't get caught up in the common, ordinary, crowd-following measurements of wealth and success. Don't be a slave to what advertisers tell you is success. I pray I have made your life just a little better with these words simply because I care about you.

Space, the Final Frontier

I caught the bug even before July of 1969. I knew all the Mercury and Gemini astronauts, I knew the Apollo astronauts as they were introduced in the papers and on the Dick Cavett show. One Christmas was especially great when my mom and dad got me the Gemini Space Capsule along with space suit and tether for my GI Joe. I spent hours floating through space tethered to that Capsule and even practiced splashdowns in our pool. I loved the space program and thought sure that one day I would take a ride from the troposphere to the stratosphere and maybe even into the mesosphere or thermosphere.

Then reality hit, it hit me when I was turned down by the US Airforce because of my two high school knee surgeries; and it hit NASA with budget cuts, wars, economies, and a "what's the point" attitude. Now with the space station nearly complete, only a few shuttles left to fly there is a malaise of what to do next.

This week, while visiting my parents and son in Florida I tethered myself to NASA again. I felt like a kid looking at the rockets, watching launch videos, watching the launch of a weather satellite from the beach and feeling the excitement of taking another small step into the Final Frontier. I believe that our deep desire to discover something new, something exciting, and something totally OTHER is a exercise of God's image within all of us. ALL of the scientists of old sought to discover the earth because within that discovery they would find a picture of the Creator. From the 50's and 60's came that same sense of discovery disguised as a space race with a cold enemy. Yet it wasn't the Russians that pushed us to space, they may have lit the pre-burners, but it was discovery of God and his creation that compelled us. Through the small, thick window of a Command Module we wiped off the moisture and said like Moses of old, "Show me your Glory!"

Ronald Reagan quoted JG Magee on January 28, 1986 on the day of the Challenger explosion, "We will never forget them this morning as they prepared for their journey and waved goodbye and slipped the surly bonds of earth to touch the face of God." Yet Magee's intent, as a WWII fighter pilot, was to describe to his parents the feeling of flying. Here is the poem in its entirety:

Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I’ve climbed and joined the tumbling mirth of sun-split clouds, – and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov’ring there,
I’ve chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless falls of air...
Up, up the long, delirious, burning blue
I’ve topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, nor eer eagle flew –
And, while with silent lifting mind I’ve trod
The high, untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand and touched the face of God.

I long again to float weightless and look at the earth as more of a satellite than a resident. To drink water that comes to you as a floating sphere and dream of an amazing creation and creator. Maybe I won't touch the face of God but I would love to catch a glimpse of his reflection as he passes. I hear tickets on Virgin Galactic are now down to only $200,000 and the new space port is being built only a few hours away in New Mexico. Time and health may be running out for me but in my mind I still "top the wind-swept heights with easy grace." Won't you join me?

Things I'll say to my Grandchildren

I am going to be a grandfather soon and that gives me pause. Not because I'm too young to be a grandfather (I am), not because my kids can't handle their own child (They CAN) but because I begin to wonder what my world will be like when we can sit and talk as adults together: me and my grandchild. When I look into my crystal ball to see what my world will be like in 25 years, when I am 75 and my grandchildren in their teens and twenties, I find myself waxing political as well as social.

So here are a few things I anticipate saying to my grandchildren:

"Back when you were born we only had 2D television and the TV had to fit on a shelf or hang on the wall."

"We had to watch commercials that interrupted our shows, but that was a great time to get up and get a snack."

"Why, yes, our TV, computer, AND cell phone were different gadgets."

"We actually believed that humans could cause global climate change. Silly now isn't it?"

"We also actually believed that humans evolved from lower life forms like monkeys! How crazy is that?"

"Back when you were I kid I would NEVER have gotten a new heart made out of my own DNA. People feared cloning would lead to soul-less zombies walking around."

"You know there was a time when we used oil to power our cars, something called gasoline, instead of just making clothes with it."

"There were television shows that would actually give prizes to people who could store facts in their heads."

"Yes there were countries that actually believed if you give everything to everybody then everybody would have everything."

"Congrats on your new Master's Degree! You know, when you were born students actually had to go to class on the teacher's schedule and you would sit in uncomfortable desks and STAY IN ONE PLACE for hours at a time listening to a lecture. They actually handed out paper for you to write on and then they graded it with a red pen. Weird right?"

"I don't care how many brain memory upgrades you get, you will never be able to upload love into your head. So come here and give me a hug because I love you!"

Emotions and your FACE, Part 1

One of my favorite shows currently is "Lie to Me" which is a show about a man who has devoted his life to the study of people's faces and what they can tell you. I have always prided myself on being able to read people's emotions and especially their eyes. There is science behind what scripture calls discernment.

The science of "Lie to Me" is based on the work of Paul Ekman. A real life psychologist who studies this thing. Hard science and hard to understand. I prefer a book by Scott McCloud called "Making Comics" where he does the same thing in comic form. To be able to draw good comics you must understand facial features. According to Scott there are only 6 real emotions, all others are combinations and variations of these six. It is kind of like the primary colors versus a variation of tone or combination of colors that make the difference. Here are his six primaries: Anger, Disgust, Fear, Joy, Sadness, and Surprise.

These six emotions are the primary colors for all emotions that we as humans feel. It doesn't matter where you are from or how old you are. We ALL have these primary emotions.

Now, right now, you might be feelings a little disgust with the things I am saying but most of you don't believe it. You think there are FAR more expressions and emotions than these six. The simple answer is: you're right, there ARE, a LOT more than these six but these are the primary emotions. Each of these can be mixed or give more or less intensity to come up with all the emotions you use every day.

But here's the thing that hit me. Look at the list of emotions again. IF they are the primary emotions can they also be the "elementary" emotions? In other words, are these not what you see in babies who, throughout their growth, learn to control, color, and nuance to the point of masking the true emotion behind it.

When you "read" someone's emotions on their face, what you are doing is looking for the hints of these six primaries. Try to find other primary emotions and next time we will study the intensities of these six to find YOUR face.

Annabel Lee by Edgar Allan Poe

It was many and many a year ago,
In a kingdom by the sea,
That a maiden there lived whom you may know
By the name of ANNABEL LEE;
And this maiden she lived with no other thought
Than to love and be loved by me.

I was a child and she was a child,
In this kingdom by the sea;
But we loved with a love that was more than love-
I and my Annabel Lee;
With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven
Coveted her and me.

And this was the reason that, long ago,
In this kingdom by the sea,
A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling
My beautiful Annabel Lee;
So that her highborn kinsman came
And bore her away from me,
To shut her up in a sepulchre
In this kingdom by the sea.

The angels, not half so happy in heaven,
Went envying her and me-
Yes!- that was the reason (as all men know,
In this kingdom by the sea)
That the wind came out of the cloud by night,
Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee.

But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we-
Of many far wiser than we-
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.

For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bride,
In the sepulchre there by the sea,
In her tomb by the sounding sea.

Say what you want about Edgar but he could put words together. His favorite topic was the death of a beautiful woman which was his topic in at least 4 other of his poems. Read this out loud and hear the words. When you read it FEEL how easily and unforced he uses rhyme and repetition. The "emotion" of the poem is dark but love comes through in unusual places; the first four lines of the last stanza particularly stand out. The moon and the stars will keep his love forever in his mind.

In this ever increasingly electronic age we need to stop and smell the proverbial roses but we also need to stop and savor words and phrases constructed NOT for the speed of tweets but for the evoking of emotion.

Window to the World

I sit at my desk and view the world. Consider what just happened the few hours I have spent in front of my window this morning:

- I just got off Skype with my brother in Peru, we conversed as if we were in the same room and were able to see each other at the same time.

- I posted a picture on Facebook to share with my friends and a dozen of them commented on it. They were from Michigan, Indiana, Iowa, South Dakota, Texas, Illinois, and even Iraq. All within the last few hours.

- I frequently talk with people that I went to high school with over 30 years ago.

- I will be sending out this column as a blog to over 700 people and they will all get it within seconds of my sending it.

- I am doing some research on Egypt and I found a live-cam on the Giza Plateau where I can look at the pyramids live and all the people who are visiting there RIGHT NOW!

- I am digitally archiving all our old photos so I am scanning them in the background while I am writing this. All these pictures bring me back to times and places and people long forgotten.

- I got a news blog that gives me articles and even news clips on the latest news and happenings in the world. I can see it in my window AS IT IS HAPPENING. I just watched a live feed from Iraq, Yemen, and Hawaii within seconds of each other.

- A friend emailed me a hilarious Youtube video which I watched and laughed till I cried.

- My home page gives me the latest of my favorite comics, the current price of gold and a few stocks I own, a live satellite image of my local weather, and pictures from all over the world taken by National Geographic.

My window to the world is an amazing thing. I hear that computers and the internet are destroying relationships and causing people to become more "closed" and separate from society. But I look through my window and see, talk, and interact with more people than I EVER would on a "real" one-on-one basis. Don't get me wrong, I and all of us need human "real" interaction and not just digital. But my window connects me with people who I would have long forgotten, with people with whom it would be impossible otherwise, more frequently and more deeply than I could or would without it. Umm ... like YOU right NOW.

Group Interaction

I wrote a number of columns back about the way people manage to walk through crowds but what is just as interesting is how crowds react to people walking through them. People react, then others react to their reaction, them more react to the reaction of the people reacting, and so on and so on and so on.

This happens in nature all the time. Near blind army ants on densely populated trails spontaneously form traffic lanes to minimize congestion. A school of fish will turn as one in reaction to a threat, as if reeling from a blow. A swarm of bees tell each other where and how far the flowers are by their particular looping flight pattern and the waggle of their tails. Range animals will take to stampeding if one of them is startled for no good reason. A High School popular will wear a particular outfit and the next week all the wannabees are wearing the same thing. You know, nature.

I was sitting at a stop light fiddling with the radio when the car in front of me lurched and I followed suit thinking the light was now green and almost ran into the back of the quick brake lights in front of me. I saw the guy behind almost hit me and so did the people next to me.

Sometimes this collective unconscious reaction is beneficial like when there is a TRUE danger or realistic incentive. Sometimes the group response is banal or harmless like a viral video or Black Friday sale. Often, though, these unconscious group motions are harmful. Yelling "FIRE" in a crowded room. Peer pressure. Enron-like doctoring numbers to make you look better. The question becomes "How can I resist the pressure, the automatic response?"

The first thing you can do is PAY ATTENTION! If I would have been watching the traffic light instead of fiddling with my radio I never would have been duped into lurching.

The second thing you can do is PLAN AHEAD! If you rehearsed your response to "Would you please lie for me?" you would NOT give in to the pressure. Rehearse saying, "I'm sorry but lying will hurt you AND me, I can't do it." If you planned your expenses and money management you would not be swayed by the latest trend or gadget.

The third thing you can do is PICK WISELY your friends and who you trust. If the people you surround yourself with are trustworthy and "have your back" then if they react you can trust their reaction and follow the group.

The fourth thing you can do is FOCUS. I had to catch chickens when I was on the farm growing up and one thing I discovered was that I could not catch all of them at one time. As much as I tried I could not catch one until I began focusing on just one and not the whole group. When I chased that ONE I could catch him. Then the distractions of the group of chicken's faded away.

So pay attention, plan ahead, pick your friends wisely, and focus. Then you will be Jenny I who weathers the storm and becomes the BubbaGump Shrimp of your world.